The Lessons of Rona. Part 1: Gratitude

Originally published via email to my community on 30th March 2020.

There seem to be two ways of approaching our current situation. One is just to get through it, the other is to get something out of it. I am focused on those who want to get something out of this, those who want to learn the lessons.

And there are many lessons to learn! Some people are already talking in positive terms about life After-Corona, certain about how this experience will change life for the better. I am personally quite doubtful about this, for all sorts of reasons, which I may or may not discuss in a future email. But if we hope for a better world After-Corona it will only happen if we make it happen, if we resolve now to do something different. I am a professional predictor, but the boiled down truth is that it is always up to us…

That aside, I do not see this situation as a random accident or a thing to be endured until we get back to business as usual. Most certainly it has come among us to teach us something, collectively and individually. Let’s start with individually, and let’s start with Gratitude.

It is nice to see random acts of gratitude in our society now, street claps for UK NHS workers the other day, for example. But it is easy to display gratitude toward those who do something for us. The real test is can we show gratitude for those who have done us wrong?

Hang on, the what?!?! Being thankful to enemies?? Well, yes, because we have a choice whether to experience life as a series of hurts, or as lessons gratefully received with thanks. And acts of gratitude – being thankful for the hidden gold buried deep in the pile of crap that has just dropped on your new carpet - keeps us away from grudge, resentment and suspicion. In short, gratitude is our escape route from the blame game, that toxic state of war within which nothing good can flourish.

But it’s difficult, partly because gratitude cannot be understood, nor its benefits appreciated, by analysing hypothetical scenarios with your mind. It has to be practiced, in real time. It has to be felt. And it often takes you way outside your comfort zone. It’s ok, I’ll go first. Here’s my acceptance speech at the 1st Annual Gratitude Oscars, in appreciation of my enemies…

“A big shout out and many thanks to all my haters, all those who have denied my words, twisted them or sought to selfishly profit from them. I am grateful to all those who have stolen my work and repackaged it as their own, robbed me, screwed me over, smiled to my face while stabbing me in the back, sought to undermine me or destroy me, mocked me or marginalised me. Here’s to those who have judged me falsely, maligned me by their own jealousies, projected their issues onto me and distorted all that I have said and done with their own fear and toxicity. Many thanks are especially due to those who doubted my intentions. I thank every single one of these people for their destructive efforts have bestowed great things upon me. So, here's to the haters, who showed me where I was weak so that I could become strong. I could not have done it without you!”

Now, if you want to do your version of this it's not about needing an apology from these people. It is also not a matter of forgetting or forgiving, nor of passive and meek victimhood. The hurts done may still hurt, but gratitude is about changing the way you see those things, moving from a suspicion narrative of closed distrust and resentment of others toward an open narrative of potentials and possibilities. We can choose to be dissatisfied with our circumstances, or we can appreciate our situation for what it allows us to learn. Gratitude is not some impossible utopian ideal, it’s the thing that determines whether you suffer or whether you smile. No one can stop the rain from falling but you can decide whether to be grateful or resentful when it does…

During these times I am receiving many emails and messages every day, from right across the world, containing details of amazing personal realisations, breakthroughs and insights. Without exception these happen when people stop hating their enemies and become grateful for being shown what they otherwise would never have seen. Our enemies help us, if they would but know it...

All this talk about GRATITUDE is intensely necessary, right now, because one of the things we have collectively forgotten is that Life is a school, not a playground. This school, Life, has a playground attached which we are free to use, but Life itself is not about playing, it’s about learning. We can either do this willingly, thankful and grateful for the opportunity to grow, or we can be dragged kicking and screaming to our lessons. We might even try to bunk off or play truant, but that’s the thing with the School of Life, everybody learns, in the end. Learning isn't an option, and lessons can only ever be postponed, never cancelled. Gratitude simply helps you – and every other pupil at this school - to have a better time of things while the lessons are running. Perceptive folk will notice that I am saying something here about our world and the state it is in...

So, for now, it’s over to you. Let me have your Gratitude Oscars Acceptance Speech, either below or by email in confidence, if you like.